Dreaming of Whitefish

I am a daydreamer. I also have a vivid imagination. For most of my life I have imagined living a better life than the one I am living. When I was a little kid I used to dream up movie plots that I would star in when I was an adult. I have imagined being married to starlets from Valerie Perrine to Elizabeth Olsen. And I have also imagined living in a great fucking house.

Last week I stumbled upon a contest that HGTV is running. Apparently they've been doing this every year for two decades, but I just learned about it. They give away a dream house. This particular house, pictured at right, is in Whitefish, Montana. The prize package includes the house, all the furnishings and artwork, a Honda Pilot Elite, and $250,000 in cash. I want that house.

One can enter two times a day up until the end of the contest (my small group of viewers better not enter!) and I, of course, am sure I'm going to win. I get so carried away with this that I start to think what living in Whitefish would be like (of course I could sell the house and live anywhere, but this one is all ready for me). I've been researching Whitefish for over a week now, finding out about the restaurants, the shopping, recreation, culture. In my mind, I'm already there.

The only time I watch HGTV is when it's on in doctor's offices or when I'm at my mother's house. She watches it all the time, as she has always been gifted when it comes to decorating and gardening. She owns a bed and breakfast in Gettysburg, PA and while my brother is the chef, she's the one that designs the interiors.

My mother and I aren't very much alike--she's a Republican and good with money and doesn't really have a weird, crazy side (I've never heard her tell a joke). I'm much more like my father, both the good (creative, great sense of humor) and the bad (can't save a nickel). But I do share my mother's DNA, and like some people keep porn stashed under the bed, I have been known to secretly read Country Living, and I love to look at house plans. I don't have the precision to be an architect, but I look at blueprints and picture how they would look in reality. One of my favorites was a house that was like a giant square with an open courtyard that had a pool in it. But I tend to favor Queen Anne style--I'm a sucker for a round tower.

The house in Whitefish is a mixture of modern design and rustic pioneer Montana. It is dominated by a great room with large windows that look out on Whitefish Lake. There is a lot of use of recycled wood--the ceiling of the kitchen is boards from an old barn. A lot of the artwork represents skiing, as Whitefish is a major winter sports area, but I have never skied and have no plans to, so I might change some of the art to a more Western flavor. I have a set of miniature Fredric Remington sculptures that would look right at home. See? I'm already writing like I own it.

The outdoor deck is awesome, with a fireplace, a grill, a hot tub, and numerous outdoor seating areas. It's ideal for entertaining, even though I would know no one up there and I don't like parties. Maybe I could just move around the house and grounds, sitting in a different place every day.

I've never been to Montana. Whitefish is up in the northwest of the state, damn near Canada, and right next to Glacier National Park. My idea of winter sports is sitting inside by a fireplace, a book in my hand and a dog in my lap, watching the snow fall outside. It's also great for summer recreation, as you can swim or boat on the lake and there's a dude ranch nearby. Maybe I could learn to ride a horse.

I will be temporarily crushed if I don't win (the odds aren't great--they can get 100 million entries) but for the time being, until I know officially that I have not won, I will continue to sit at my computer at work, making the time go by thinking about living in this house, having my friends and family visit, and maybe meeting a cute cowgirl.