The Tourist

When it was released last December, I was looking forward to seeing The Tourist, but bad reviews scared me away. This was a good thing, because it turns out the film is a real dud. It features two megastars, but they display an astounding lack of chemistry.

Florian Henckel von Donnersmarck, who won an Oscar for the excellent The Lives of Others, makes his Hollywood money grab and falls flat. Supposedly a stylish take on the spy thriller, The Tourist instead is a muddle, with a couple of obligatory twists, one of which, while clever, makes no logical sense.

Johnny Depp and Angelina Jolie are the stars. He's a meek math teacher on a train from France to Venice. She's the girlfriend of an international thief, being trailed by Interpol in the hope of leading them to him. She spots Depp on the train and pretends he's the thief, though he doesn't know it. He's dazzled by her, and she feels guilty about putting him in danger.

There's the requisite action scenes--a chase across the rooftops of Venice, and of course, a boat chase through the canals, but none of it seems right. Jolie has never looked more ravishing, but frankly I'm tired of seeing her in action roles like this. I realize they fund her charitable works, but I'd like to see her do meatier stuff with a lower payday. Depp is almost completely at a loss trying to play a nebbish, hiding his matinee idol status behind a disheveled, mumbling character.

The twist at the end gives us some of the reasons behind this, but I'm still not convinced. The Tourist is a sluggish, pointless exercise, and only succeeds at being a commercial for Venice tourism, but when has that ever been necessary?