2015 MTV Video Awards

The 2015 MTV Video Awards are happening right now. I'm not watching--it would make me think end times are near--but for this second straight year I have looked at the nominees for Best Video, just so I know what the kids are listening to these days.

Beyonce is back for a second year in a row with "7/11," and frankly, I don't know what to say about this. It certainly does not appeal to me as a song--I understand this is a "trap" song, and it's probably good to dance to, but repeated listens would likely give me a seizure. As a video, it has Beyonce and a lot of scantily clad women dancing on a hotel balcony, and perhaps in a nod to Toby Keith, holding red Solo cups. "Don't drop that alcohol" is a repeated phrase, and Beyonce talks into her barefoot as if it were a telephone.

Ed Sheeran's "Thinking Out Loud" is a pretty song, and one of the things I like about it is that it could have been written in any time period--it avoids trends. It's catchy but thin, the kind of song that teenage girls listen to. The video is also timeless, simply Sheeran and dancer Brittany Cherry (looking easy on the eyes in a flimsy dress) doing some dirty dancing.

Speaking of easy on the eyes, Taylor Swift's "Bad Blood" is something I would have loved when I was thirteen. As we all know, Swift has befriended every famous young woman in the world, and has cast many of them in this video, which is a takeoff on a spy film. Swift, along with homies like Selena Gomez, Cara Delevingne, Gigi Hadid, and many more, are in skin tight outfits, shooting guns and throwing punches. The song itself is not bad if almost instantly forgettable. Given Swift's dominance of the music industry these days, it's the likely winner.

My favorite is "Uptown Funk," by Mark Ronson, sung by Bruno Mars. It's a toe-tapping, finger-snapping homage to the Minneapolis sound (Prince) and is the kind of song that just makes you feel good. The video is an unpretentious display of exuberance and Mars looking good in a lavender jacket, but I'm a bit puzzled by the visit to a hairdresser, where he and Ronson both go under those big dryers.

The most visually ambitious video is Kendrick Lamar's "Alright," which is powerful statement about the open season on unarmed black men by police officers, shot in beautiful black and white images by Colin Tilley. However, I find the song to be a mess, a mixture of rap and improvisational jazz. Maybe I'm hopelessly out of touch, but is too much to ask that a song have a melody?

None of these videos make me want to rush out and buy any music, although I will check out Ronson's stuff. Bruno Mars, though he doesn't sing my kind of music (rock and roll, dig it) is still a tremendous performer. If I happen to see him on TV, I'll stop and watch. So I hope "Uptown Funk" wins, but I'm sure it won't.