Collectibles

Do you collect things? I think most people, at least in the Western world, do, if they have disposable income (and sometimes even if they don't). But why do we do it? I suppose it's just another way to get some pleasure out of our normally miserable lives.

I've collected many things over the years, mostly in a half-ass way, flitting from one thing to another. Mostly I end up stopping either because of the money or because I ran out of places to put them. I've been thinking about this subject for a while and I think the first things I collected were Matchbox and Hot Wheels cars, and then baseball cards. I bought them pack by pack, and spent a lot of time trading with other kids. The glee one felt when you opened a pack and a famous player was in there! I don't think I ever collected an entire year's worth of cards, but I had a lot. All gone now.

Then, in the '80s, I bought them set by set. I did that for a few years, and still have them in albums, but never look at them. Buying an entire set of Topps cards in one fell swoop certainly wasn't as fun as hunting down a Hank Aaron card pack by pack.

Then came the Wacky Packages phase, and the Odd Rods and Silly Cycles. These were stickers that features either parodies of actual products or pictures of goofy looking cars and motorcycles. When I was in junior high the Wacky Package craze as at full volume, as boys would whisper about where a new bunch could be found. That was the fun of collecting.

Over the years I've collected other things, but never with some kind of commitment that I had to have every single one. I bought many comic books over the years, but not for investment (I don't have any of them left). To me, collecting for investment isn't a hobby, it's a business. I am a member of a Facebook group about comics, and most of those guys are collectors who can name an artist just by looking at a picture. I'm no expert like that, and I certainly don't have the money to buy old issues (I just saw an episode of one of those pawn shop shows were a copy of the first comic to feature Spider-Man went for over five-thousand dollars).

I've also tried stamps, Franklin Mint stuff, pulp magazines, old Playboys, Harbor Lights lighthouses, and action figures (I only collected the female characters. I have a Winona Ryder figure from Alien IV that might be worth something). But I quickly give up on what I'm collecting, and move on to something else, and I'm okay with that. I'm not one of these people who goes crazy if I'm missing one issue of Batman from 1965. I've become more Zen lately about possessions. When I moved to Vegas I had to throw a lot of stuff out, and I put a lot of stuff in storage. I had a whole locker full of my Playboy collection, maybe thirty years worth, and all of my porn DVDs (hundreds). When I didn't pay my bill they sold my stuff. Imagine the face of the guy who bought that!

I do have something of a hoarder inside me. I understand the impulse of not wanting to throw anything away, because I might need it some day. But this has definitely lessened over the years. My friend has not given that up, though. She collects antique typewriters, saves her movie ticket stubs, collects Alice in Wonderland stuff, and other literary knick-knacks. I used to go with her to ephemera shows, where postcards, sheet music, old magazines, etc. were sold. We also used to go to Chiller Theater shows, where vendors sold anything associated with horror/sci-fi movies. I used to buy movie posters. I have none of them left. Quasi-celebrities were there to sign autographs. Once we went to a show that was just after The Phantom Menace came out, and the guy who played Darth Maul was signing, and had a long line (he was in a special room, so no one could take photographs unless they paid). What would his autograph be worth now? He probably has trouble getting arrested. Autographs are one of the dumbest things to collect. Usually you can't read the signatures and it just seems like proof you actually came across a famous person. Who cares?

Collections vary as to one's interests and budget. People collect beer cans, figurines of a certain animal (I have a friend who collect cows), cereal boxes, pogs, goofy ties, you name it. But there are things that require a much higher income. Cars, for instance. If I had that much money, like Jay Leno, would I spend it on cars? Maybe. I think if I had the money, I'd collect first editions of my favorite books. Most of my favorites are from the '50s on, so it wouldn't be like buying a copy of the First Folio. I'd also love to collect art. Not by famous artists--they should be in museums--but I'd love to go into a gallery and discover something and just buy it because I liked it. I remember a 60 Minutes piece on Thomas Kincade, and there was a couple who had dozens of his paintings on every available wall space. Now, most people who know anything about art know that Thomas Kincade is kitsch and has no artistic value (sort of like the big-eyed children by Margaret Keane) but I had to admire their commitment.

The Buddhist monks make sand paintings that are incredibly intricate and take a lot of talent and patience, and when they're done, let the sand blow away. This teaches that nothing is permanent. I wish I was secure enough to let go of most of my possessions, but I still have a long way to go.